It seems like this is exactly what we have been doing now for 2 years...waiting. I realize that God has us in this "holding pattern" for a reason but at times, it is so hard to try to make sense of it all. I guess I'm not suppose to make sense of it and just WAIT to see what outcome God has for us.
It all started with me losing my part-time job, that paid me a full-time wage, and had allowed me to pretty much work from home. We made it through that year, struggling, but made it. We went to our first marriage conference that fall (Weekend to Remember put on by FamilyLife), not because our marriage was falling apart, we were far from that, but because we needed to get away to search what God was wanting from us. We spent time praying about what it was that God wanted us to do. We were then, and still are now, willing to move where ever God wants to us to be. At that point, we really felt the calling to apply to be a part of the ministry that FamilyLife has. We still feel like this is where God is calling us. We have been on a "wait" for 13 months now. After going almost 6 months of that with no contact, we got an email from our contact, about a month ago now, from FamilyLife checking in to see how things are going. In the midst of our email conversations, we get the message that if we can get everything to fall into place, they would like us to tentatively plan on being there the middle of November for "Preview Weekend"...basically the final step of the application process. So, we have put our house back up for sale, we tried selling it last spring and pulled the sign down in December. Many people wonder why we are putting our house up for sale before knowing if we are going to FamilyLife. Well, here's the answer to that.
FamilyLife would like to see us living on a specific budget...this includes being able to put money away each month for gifts, car repairs, vacations, etc. Currently, we have enough each month to cover just what we need to cover. Yes, it has been tough but it has been an amazing experience to watch how God is constantly providing for us. Back to why we are selling...if we can sell our house, it will free up money every month to be able to put together the budget FamilyLife is looking for. Our plans are to rent for awhile. Even if we don't end up going to FamilyLife, we are perfectly content with the idea of renting until we know where God wants us and again, will help with the monthly finance part of it. If we end up staying here, I will look for a few more hours a week of work in the fall while Ethan is in preschool 4 days a week (1/2 days). Then, once he is in Kindergarten, I can add more hours. We will hopefully be able to save and eventually buy a home again.
We know that God is going to take care of us. He has been for the past 2 years. It's just the WAITING that is hard. I'm know we all have times of waiting. I'm sure it is just as hard for you as it is for me. And, I'm not asking you to feel sorry for us. I don't want that! More than anything, I would ask that you just join us in praying. Pray that God will give us a clear direction. Pray that we would be able to sell our home, by owner, quickly in this VERY TOUGH housing market. Pray that we would be able to continue to meet our monthly needs.
We will continue to keep you updated as we go through this process of WAITING. In a way, it is kind of exciting to be on this adventure and to see what God has for us in the end. Don't get me wrong, there are plenty of times when exciting is not the word and stress takes over. But, that's when we are reminded to give it all back to God...the control freak in me would like to just solve this whole thing but I know that I'M NOT THE ONE IN CONTROL...GOD IS!!!
Have an amazing Monday!